I sold my house of 23 years in the District of Columbia last year. In preparation, I took up the carpets and rolled up the rugs. And there it was: 23 years of dirt and debris. What? I assumed I am a reasonably good housekeeper. I had vacuumed regularly. I shampooed periodically. On the outside and on the surface, my house was clean and tidy in appearance. Who knew? It took years for that dirt to become deeply hidden. Actually, my house was built in 1904, so much of that dirt was shaken loose from within the very structure of the house. It wasn’t my dirt . . . or was it?
My life is like that too. Racism is like that too. For white people like me it became easy to think there is no problem. “I am not a racist.” I was taught to respect others, so what is the problem? Racism may not be intentionally in my heart and mind, but it planted itself there regardless because society had made certain:
You’ve got to be taught to hate and fear
You’ve got to be taught from year to year
It’s got to be drummed in your dear little ear
You’ve got to be carefully taught
Little by little I learned implicit racism. I lived in a white neighborhood. I went to a white school. We had a housekeeper who came everyday to take care of me while my parents were working in the family business. Her name was Ruby. She taught me my ABCs and “Jesus love me this I know. . . .” I was an adult before I wondered how her own children were being cared for across the tracks. I was kept ignorant by the system to the legacy of slavery. My history book literally said “When the slaves came to America …” That was not a Carnival cruise! I’ve since understood that “history is the fable agreed upon.”
The COVID pandemic and the resulting stay at home orders forced most of us inside. It also gave us the opportunity to look inside ourselves in a fresh way if we chose to do so. Recent events have reminded me of the importance to pull up the carpets of my heart and mind and examine the dirt that has accumulated. I may not have put all that dirt there, but it is my responsibility to clean it up before I (and the world) can move on.
I’m still cleaning up. How about you?
–
Rev. Jim Taylor, retired
Before retirement, Jim was pastor of Mount Vernon Place United Methodist Church (UMC) in Baltimore, Maryland from 2006-2010. Before that, he served as the Associate General Secretary of the General Commission on Religion and Race of the UMC in Washington, DC from 1992-2006.
Originally from Indianapolis, Indiana, he now resides in Rio Vista, California.
Great post. Glad you shared it!